Deeper than the deepest sea

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By Ging-ging Avellanosa Valle

Bahin sang Bubay

Sunday, May 11, 2014

THEY say that a mother’s love is unfathomable, so deep that nothing can ever understand why she loves so boundlessly. When mothers became the centre of attraction just like what the commercialized world that we are in are trying to do when they hype to the max mother’s day as if it is the most important in the world such that it urges everyone to spend and spend more for the matriarch in the family.

While no one can deny that the role of a mother is beyond what it may seem, it is a fact also that most of the time this role is often ignored and taken for granted by everyone. At home, “Mama” is the super-hero: from the break of dawn to the wee hours at night, she is the captain of the ship that makes sure that everything runs accordingly, such that each and every member of the “crew” in her family are well-provided and attended to, especially the so-called “haligi ng tahanan”.

The “ilaw”, so it seems, must light up the home at all times, with or without the “bread-winner” who is supposed to be the father. In our day and time, there are more single parents than society would have wanted it to be. But then it is society, unwittingly, that drives many among the youth to go on and do the things that they would later on regret they have done at all.


Thus, many of the single parents are most of the time young women who were impregnated by their irresponsible partners and left to fend for themselves. And when the women’s families shun their own kin for having committed such “mistakes”, and punishes her by abandoning her to face the consequences of her acts and that of her partner, pitifully she finds herself in a bind. And that’s where the problem comes in.

But such things are glossed over when “Mother’s Day” is celebrated by society. The struggle of women for emancipation and for all that she rightfully deserves to have will never be given on a silver platter, as there is seemingly a conscious effort to separate the concerns of women from the glorification and patronage of the mother. As if the mother can be separated from her origins.

No, that is not beside the point, as mothers are essentially the all-suffering creature that she is. But for all her weaknesses, she is the strongest in the family.

She listens when she would rather do something else. When she’s happy she cries, and keeps her sadness to herself when something comes up and she could not open up. So it is Mother’s day, how I wish all mothers can have what they want and what they want to do today to celebrate her day. How I wish mothers can be free from doing the mundane things that she has to do even for just a day.

How I wish her partner and her children will recognize the pains that she has to go through every day that she struggles to find her “balance” in her work and in her home. Because it is only when she is recognized as a person that we can really say we celebrate her presence in our lives.

May all families find the real meaning of what it is that mothers represent, even just for today, for a start. And then we can truly say, we are happy for you mother!

Published in the Sun.Star Davao newspaper on May 12, 2014.


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